Crossing my fingers...
I feel that on some days I am just lucky to get everyone out of the house in clothes and somewhat on time, however I always seem surprised when I realize that I haven't kept up with my webpage. So like every year, I vow this year will be the one where all of my ducks stay nicely in a row (usually I am just happy if they happen to be on the same lake). This is a strange year in Education...I will be prepping my English 12's to write their provincial exam that no other grade will ever have to do again. I am warning my English 11's that they will write an as undeveloped English assessment before they graduate. I am preparing to try and include more of the new curriculum into my teaching as I try to work my head around what is coming down the pipe for next fall. Also, changing is the fact that students and parents now have complete access to my marks program...which means I also need to be on top of that, but also means that students (and their parents) have more of a stake in their education and won't be reliant on me for interims.
Crossing my fingers...
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So my plan to do a regular blog has somewhat fallen by the wayside, as often does stuff that adds additional expectations of fulfillment to my already jam-packed lifestyle. Semester 1 has already drawn to a close and it seems like it should have just been starting. Yet again, I sit back and reflect on my teaching approach over the last semester, and as per usual find more to critique than to praise...which in my eyes is a good thing as it means that I am still learning, adapting and changing. The biggest thing that I berate myself for, is not doing everything that I planned to accomplish. This was especially true with this past semester and my Psychology 11 block. I have been waiting (it seems like forever) to have a chance to teach Psychology again, and I had so many grandiose plans. But as is common, my grand plans got overtaken by marking, prepping and my day-to-day existence outside of school. Luckily for me, my class was hugely understanding and supportive and still maintained an interest despite (or perhaps in spite of)my approach. Regardless, I still loved having the opportunity to teach Psychology as it is definitely a passion of mine and is so different than the other classes that I teach. As for my English courses, what began as a class that I figured was going to "suck my lifeblood" actually turned into a group of kids that I will actually miss - which is what usually happens. As I approach my second semester, I am excited to try some new components of the proposed incoming curriculum while rehashing some of my old favorites.
With only 28 class days left, I am able to breathe a little easier. My marking has eased somewhat (until my 12's start in on their practice provincials) and although I feel the omnipresent time crunch, I feel confident that I can most of what I need to get done...done! Hopefully... As with the past few weeks of every year that I have taught, these last few have been particularly overwhelming. It seems like the first part of my semester is always top-heavy in the marking department, I guess because I am collecting so much to try and establish where my students are and evaluating their progress. Although I do not kid myself that I will be taking no marking home in the next 28 days, I am hoping that with the exception of several practice provincials, that it will be less. I find this time of year is increasingly difficult to balance home and work, as the days are longer, the trailer is calling and my yard is desperately needing some attention. Oh well, 28 days....I think I can, I think I can...
The quote on my board today was "If you create a greenhouse of your classroom, then don't expect your students to take root in the changing climate of world." All of my classes spent some time talking about how teachers need to stop enabling students and start giving them the skills that are going to be necessary in real life. I struggle with this, as I want to instill the skills that I feel will help my students in their future, but because they are still teenagers, and are not necessarily making the best choices for themselves, I find that I do babysit and enable them far more than I would prefer. I shouldn't have to make phone calls home to the students who missed class as both a reminder to them and their parents that I am checking up on them. This is the part of teaching that is so frustrating to me, as I can happily let them fail my class through little effort or minimal attendance (and this would actually be easier), but instead I feel like I am dragging many of them through kicking and screaming. Why should I care so much, if they don't? It must be because I know that the vast majority of them will look back and realize that their actions now did have consequences, even if they cannot see that yet.
I did one of my regular "evaluations" with my students last week, and the results are almost comical. With the exception of a couple of outliers, 1/2 the students said that I was moving too fast, 1/2 said I could move faster. 1/2 said they like doing multiple concepts in each block, 1/2 said they only want to do one concept. 1/2 said they liked the way I teach, 1/2 had suggestions on ways to improve. As statistical data, I am not sure how verifiable these responses are, but they seem to indicate that I am doing things neither too well nor too bad. As with every year, particularly around this time, I struggle with my profession and my choices. I strive to be a teacher who is fair and somewhat fun to take a class with. However, I also want to be that teacher that someone learns something from. Most importantly, I want kids to learn something, somewhat useful while still enjoying their class time and their process of learning.
We are struggling this year with an unequal distribution of students across classes (some blocks are chock full and some are not so much). As one of the senior English teachers, my classes are full at 30 a piece, while other blocks of the same course have 1/2 the number of students. I know it is important for some students to have choice and some students work better with certain teaching styles over others, but something must be done to equalize the distribution of students. Feeling a little guilty today...I had two students who expressed an interest in teaching and my first instinct was to tell them `not to do it.` I think that is a sad reflection on what should be an awesome career. I love my job - no really - but you cannot approach teaching and expect it not to consume you (and everyone around you). It scares me to think of young people getting into this profession because they are passionate about it and want to help kids, only to become demoralized, disappointed and dejected once they realize that their passion will only take them so far and that the actual teaching part of their job will become overshadowed by paperwork, marking, meetings, and behavior modification. It is sad to think that 1/2 of all students who go into the teaching field do not last the first five years and often succumb to the inherent stress and intense time commitment necessary. That being said, if I could do it over again I would still be teaching...and I can't even begin to imagine myself doing anything else. However, I am also hyper aware of how much of my energy, dedication and patience is used at school, and how little of it remains for all of my other endeavors including my family. It is a constant balancing act, and unfortunately not one that I am always successful in managing.
So while I am hesitant to add anything more to what already seems like an incredibly busy lifestyle, I am going to once again attempt to utilize technology a little more readily in my classroom and hope to use my website that I first started creating in 2013. My hesitation surfaces in regards to being responsible for one more thing, but I am hoping that I if I can make it a routine, that I will be able to update assignments, important dates and events and other useful information...we will see how that goes.
As to the start of my second semester, I can't believe that we are entering the last week of February already. Although I am thankful to have my spare this semester, 3 senior English classes with 30 kids a piece is going to make my marking load atrocious. Aggravating this is the fact that I already have students who have displayed a clear pattern of skipping and we are only in day 8. I find this incredibly frustrating as it means that I not only have to backtrack (which affects everyone in the class), but I am also wasting valuable time "chasing" these students and trying to remind them of the importance of coming to class. If you want out of high school so badly because it is boring you, or you have better things to do with your time - here is a news flash - failing your courses is only going to necessitate you being here even longer. Do the math... Although I love my job (even on my worst days), I do wish that I could dedicate more time teaching those who want to be taught than catching up those who don't... |
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September 2017
Melinda MacKinnonMother of two small children, wife and a secondary English teacher - quickly realizing that an extra 24 hours a day would be really beneficial. Categories |